Jeremy Padawer
Thistle. You are the worst Crayola crayon of all time. Just saying thistle while looking at this color grates the nerves.
In second place? Flesh. Flesh is quite possibly the most racist crayon naming choice of all time, and I can see why to some Flesh wins out.
But I ask the Flesh crayon haters to step back and objectively reassess. Say Thistle a few times. See this color and try not to feel aggravated. 
I just set a world record for time spent watching a movie before turning it off. LALA Land… 1 minute 8 seconds… why are all of these people singing and jumping around???
While I embrace the more intellectualized, political version of Facebook, I do miss the gentler days when folks said low horsepower stuff like…
“Pretzel bread with no salt is ridiculous. Delta is clueless on what makes a good turkey sandwich. No salt??? WHAT?”
“My cat totally thinks she’s a dog. My dog thinks it’s a human. This is the totality of my life. Literally, it doesn’t get more complicated than this moment of thought.”
“Does anyone even know how to contact a Congressperson? This pretzel bread salt thing has me fuming.”
“I watched Arrival with my dog this morning. He’s been hurriedly nosing his kibble around on the floor and I think he’s attempting to spell Tromp or Trump. So much for thinking he’s human. This is clearly just a dog.”
“It’s Monday. Monday Funday!”
Just wanted to bring back Facebook 2013 for a few moments. Much love.
The government is actively soliciting engineering and architectural drawings for the border wall. As a patriot, I’ve been working diligently this morning on a big, beautiful wall. Before I officially submit it, I was hoping to solicit your advice and thoughts.
Middle age is when you start to realize that someone actually uses every product sold at CVS.